A Little Cup of Cyanide

Do you know what I was doing at six o'clock this morning? I was just going to bed. Why was I just going to bed when most people were just waking up? I was up all night watching Heroes. Thirteen straight hours of Heroes. I started watching around five when my mom left for the hospital. I don't normally watch TV. But my mom was at the hospital, my dad was at a race, I never see Suze unless she wants someone to watch Atalya, my computer was acting up again, and god forbid I make any friends in this town. The TV was on SciFi when I turned it on, and it's one of those things where commercials are on, so you have to wait until the commercials are over to see what's on before you flip the channel, but I never ended up flipping the channel. Instead, I got sucked into it and ended up watching it the rest of the day. And I still think I missed about eight episodes or so. Which left me with some questions.

What was the deal with Niki and Jessica? I get that Jessica took over when something needed taking care of. But how did she take over? Was it like multiple personalities or something? Was it something completely explainable like schizophrenia? Or was that her power, being able to let someone else take over when she couldn’t handle it? Or was Jessica really in control of when she came and went?

When exactly did Claire’s dad figure out Claire had her power? When he saw the video? Or did he suspect she had them before then? Before the tape ever went missing he kept asking if there was anything she wanted to talk about. so did he suspect she got her powers? Or was he just paranoid because he always knew it would happen?

It seems like a million different people want the city blown up. Are they all working together, or do they all have their own reasons for doing it?

What exactly is Syler’s motivation for blowing up the city? Does he just want to prove to his mom that he can be special? Has he actually stated a clear motive? Is it just one of those “hey, I’m evil, I don’t need a motive” things? And if he just wants to be normal like he says, why is he going around collecting as many different powers as he can get his hands on?

What’s the deal with the paper company? I still don’t completely get the concept behind the whole company. Why do they want to blow up the city? And why do they want to track the people with powers?

To sum it up, I’m confused. And to top it off, I’ll have to compete for the TV to watch the season finale. The almighty Bachelor is on at 9:30. And it doesn’t matter who is watching what, when The Bachelor comes on, the TV belongs to my mom.

I've been super fascinated by the whole concept of glamourbombing. It's one of those things I've wanted to try but have been to scared to because people are idiots. Take this story for example. Okay, it's not exactly a great example of glamourbombing, but that would probably be the outcome for me. You try to do something nice for people, and you get punished for it. People are too fucking paranoid these days.

Anyway, I was thinking about buying a bunch of fake flowers from the Dollar Tree and leaving them places with nice little notes attached. Maybe just simple stuff like "You deserve a flower." or something. Nice little cheery messages just to lighten someones day when they find it. No one can possibly find that threatening.

Sometime last week, maybe around Thursday or Friday, I woke up to discover that my eye was really, really itchy. I mean, super itchy. Like, if it was someplace where I couldn’t poke my eye out by scratching it, like my back or something, I would have to find the brush with the sharp bristles. The next day, there were two little red spots on my eye lid. And it was still itchy as all fuck. The next day, those two little red spots had turned into red bumps. And by the next day those red bumps had become squishy yellow bumps.

At this point I was freaking out. But not enough to visit a doctor. For some reason, every time I get some strange new ailment, I get the urge to let it get really, really bad before I realize that it’s not going away on its own. So, my eye had squishy yellow bumps. No big deal. But it only got worse. The next day my whole eyelid was puffy and swollen. I looked something like the Disney version of Quasimodo. Did I mention that all this time those two bumps were growing?

Finally on Wednesday my mom had to go to the hospital for her weekly blood work. Well, by this time I was afraid that if I waited any longer I would wake up and my eye would be swollen shut. So, I figure since I’m here at the hospital, I might as well get it checked out. Honestly, if I hadn’t been at the hospital, I probably would have waited at least another week. So I get back there, and I get this doctor with some weird accent that I’m almost certain can’t be understood by anyone but other people who live wherever she comes from. Seriously, I’ve never heard anything quite like it. She takes two seconds to shine a light on my eyelid and tell me I have blisters, and that she’s never seen blisters on a person’s eyelid before. And she asks me if I’ve had an electric rod near my eye.

WHAT? First off, what is an electric rod? It sounds dangerous. Not something I would want any part of me near, least of all my eye. Second, if I had gotten an electric rod near my eye, does she seriously think I would have waited that long to get it checked? I clearly stated that it had been weird for about a week. I also clearly stated that I had no clue what was wrong with it. If think I would have a pretty good idea what caused it if I got my eye near one of these electric rod things.

So, after telling me she had never seen anything like it before, she tells me it’s an infection and prescribes me an antibiotic. You should see these things. They’re monsters. I have to take three of them a day until they’re gone. Yay. So, it sucks to be me right now. Or my eyelid.

I will say one thing, though. If I ever have an emergency, I’m going to Mercy Hospital. They got me in and out like woah fast. Okay, so I doubt their competence in their doctors. But I was out before my mom even got her bloodwork done. And sometimes I have to wonder if anyone has ever died in the waiting room at Altoona Hospital.

My mom watches this Intervention show all the time. It's about people who have addictions and their families are trying to help them. It's interesting. It lacks the music and animation elements that are required of anything that I might consider watching on my own, though. It just makes me mad sometimes how she watches these things. Especially when she knows what they do to her. I don't get why people watch things on TV or listen to music that they know are going to get them upset. It's like me watching The Bachelor or something along those lines. All it will do is piss me off because all they care about is getting the money. So I avoid watching those kinds of things. Why some people seem to be drawn to the things that bother them is beyond me. Okay, so there are some people who watch things that freak them out so they can complain about it later and get attention. Dearest Little Miss Drama Machine. But she's just so ridiculous sometimes that it's right on that line between "Shut the fuck up" and "Oh my god, you're hilarious."

So, I was revising poems for my creative writing portfolio, and I decided to do a post. Why? Because revising poetry can keep me entertained for only, oh, let's say all of two seconds. Then I want to start ripping my hair out or bashing people's heads in with my computer. Which is bad. Poem revision = bad.

Only two finals to go and I'll be outa here. I should be super excited. Actually, I'm not. Weird. I was packing my stuff earlier trying to be excited, and it just hit me out of nowhere. I don't want to be packing my stuff up, and I don't want to be going home. It could be because I spent most of the year here. I only got home three times the whole year. It could be that I'm just now starting to let my bubble thin out a little. I'm pretty sure that once I get home the only contact I'll have with the outside world is through my computer. Although I do have some pretty awesome plans, I know how my plans usually work out. Look at the infamous AFI concert. Not only did I not get to go, but I lost $60 in the process, and one of my suitemates was actually scared of me for a while after that. Anyway, I know I'll be locked away in my house for the next few months. And after the progress I've made, it kind of feels like it was all for nothing. It took me a year to get where I am at the moment. It won't take a whole 3-4 months to undo it. So I'll be starting over in August, I guess.

Okay, finished emo-ing, I've been pretty busy lately. I'm sure I would have loved to rant about all my doings before, but it's only fun to rant straight after. So yeah. Let's just leave it at Lisa, yes, Lisa, has been busy. You just fainted, right? Right? I knew you would.